A Hoopteedah Planet, Named Nuplesphat

by Ed Riley copyright 2002

A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away there was a little hoopteedah planet called Nuplesphat. The people of Nuplesphat were a hard working industrious people, for the most part. When they weren't working, they all indulged in the planetwide pastime of hoopteedah, or hoops. The citizens of Nuplesphat either played hoops, or were avid fans.

Nups, as the people of Nuplesphat liked to call themselves, were a very gracious and courteous folk. Please and thank-you were always on the tip of everyone's tongue. Was there an exception? Of course! When it came to the game of hoops, this, they took very, very seriously.

One day a set of coaches came along, whose philosophies departed from the norm, just a teensie lil bit. They didn't want to believe in the Natural Selection Process, or NSP, for very personal reasons.

NSP is the belief that the strong will rise to the top and survive. The weaker of a species will eventually die out. The Nups found this to be true in nature A LOT. So they believed that what was good enough for mother nature, must be good enough for them. This was the unwritten Law of the Land.

One more thing you need to understand, Nuplesphat was a very technologically advanced planet. They would do genetic tests at birth to determine who would have the ability to play hoopteedah. Those whose genes were even the least bit questionable, were given over to the science guild, or the artist guild, or whatever guild they tested positive for. So a Nups future was determined at birth.

To get back to the story, there were 4 coaches who didn't quite adhere to NSP. They believed that as the Nups' pups were in their formative years, every Nup's pup deserved the chance to learn and play hoopteedah, regardless of the pup's athletic ability. They believed this and actually acted on their belief. This created a huge uproar on Nuplesphat. But being the polite Nups that they were, the worst someone would say is "Well I never!" But, for a Nup, this was like the ultimate curse.

These 4 coaches had been coaching Nup pups for years under the regular hoop system. Then, in the same year, all 4 got married. Two years later all 4 had a pup of their own. Their wives' 17 month pregnancies consisted of a lot of plans for their future Nup hoopteedah superstar pups. They had visions of all of their pups playing on the same team. They had visions of planet championship trophies on their mantleplaces. Life was good!

They all believed it was a most wonderful omen that all 4 of their pups were born on the same day. They toasted their wives that night for such a miraculous event.

Two days later the hospitals gave them the bitter news, their pups would never be hoopteedah players. All their pups were slated for different guilds. Instead of being joyous at the birth of their pups, all 4 coaches were devastated. Their pups would never experience the joy of playing the game. And, they would never enjoy coaching their own pups. Life was not good to these 4 Nups, not at all!

Time went on, and as their pups reached the age that most hoopteedah players started learning the game, the pups watched their fathers coach their regular teams. The more they watched, the more they wanted to play. They would stand in the corner of the court and listen to their respective dad's teach other players.

A year of this went by, just standing in the corners, listening, and absorbing what their dads told other players. One day there was a tourney where all four of their dad's teams were playing. While the games were going on, these 4 pup-Nups sat together and talked about what each player was doing right and wrong. They spent all day long watching games, reviewing each move, and arguing about what the players should have done.

Throughout the day while these 4 pups were watching and reviewing, their moms were sitting right behind them. At first their pups incessant chattering was totally distracting. These moms were more avid fans of the game than most, so they kept politely asking their pups to keep the volume down.

Halfway through the day, the moms couldn't help but hear their pups reviewing each move and each game. They were absolutely amazed at the knowledge these pups had. They actually understood the game better than the players on the floor.

The next day each of the moms told their husbands about their pups detailed and accurate accounts of the previous day's games. Each dad then chatted with their pup and sure enough, these pups knew what they were talking about. Each of these pups begged their dads to let them play. You know what the old saying is, don't you? "It's hard for a Nup to say no to their pup!"

That night the 4 coaches called each other and arranged to meet for a swill at the local swilling hole. They each told essentially the same story. They then formulated their radical plan, they were going to secretly teach their pups to play hoopteedah.

After 2 years of secret practices, 4,000 headache killers, and a whole lot of patience, they were ready to try out their experiment. They each talked a player on their own team into playing in a tourney with their own pups, so that gave them 8 players.

They entered a tourney under a new team name. The 1st game could have been viewed as 2 separate games. The 1st half was a total mess. Between their pups being nervous and lack of game experience, they were losing by 18 points.

The 2nd half was totally different. The pups weren't nervous and two years of skills training paid off. Even though they couldn't outrun or outjump anyone on the other team, they could still outthink them. They used every move and trick they had learned. They ended up winning by 2.

The moral of the story, other than the most athletic don't always win? And, that it pays off to listen, learn, then outthink your opponent? And that heart and hustle is as important as athleticism? And that there is no substitute for desire? If these aren't the true morals of the story, then what is?

NEVER TELL A NUP-PUP, NOT TO DREAM UP!!!