The
Curse of the Sneaky B-Baller
by ed riley copyright 2002
I'm sitting here all alone,
I'm sitting in my room.
I feel so bad, so very bad,
I know that I am doomed.
Oh why did I let those words slip out,
Oh why did I utter that curse?
Because of this I know that I
Will play my very worst!
I really didn't mean it
When I cast my magic spells,
I really don't want her sick,
Now, I wish that she were well.
It's just that I'd always started
I'd never been on the bench,
So when Coach gave Sue my starting spot,
I cursed her with fists clenched!
I made a triangle on my patio
Lit candles for each end,
I sat at the tip of the triangle
On the other two sat friends.
I cursed Sue with the sickly warts
That comes with the Spell of the Frog,
Then I wished she got the Creepy Foam,
With the spell of the Rabid Dog!
Then I wished that all her hair'd fall out
with the spell of the Eye of Newt,
Last, I wished that she would quit the team
I called that spell "The Boot!"
Who was this girl, this cocky girl
Who thought to take my spot?
Well I'd show her, with my final curse
The Spell of the Jungle Rot!
I was satisfied that my friends and I
Had done everything we'd planned,
As everyone knows, there are certain times
A girl's got to take a stand!
I went to school the very next day
With a smile upon my face,
Because I knew that girl, that girl named Sue
Would never take my place.
I may only be a 4th grade girl
And I'm short and look so meek,
But don't you ever mess with me
Cause my spells are strong, they're sure not weak.
I got the news, the blessed news
Of what happened to Sue the Vamp
It seems that the last hour of school
Found Sue with stomach cramps!
It worked, it worked, it really worked
What else should I expect?
I guess that'll show everyone else
Just who they should respect!
Then I thought, "Just stomach cramps?"
After all the spells I'd cast,
She might get well and play tonight
If she just passed a lil gas!
Then I got a phone call
As soon as I got home,
"Sue's real sick, deathly sick,"
I heard as I dropped the phone!
Now I'm sitting here all alone,
I'm sitting in my room.
I feel so bad, so very bad,
I know that I am doomed.
Oh why did I let those words slip out,
Oh why did I utter that curse?
Because of this I know that I
Will play my very worst!
I really didn't mean it
When I cast my magic spells,
I really don't want her sick,
Now, I wish that she were well.
I searched and found my rabbit's foot
And I wished for Sue's good health,
I wished my curses would fly away
Like a silent flying stealth.
The phone rang again, as I answered it
The voice on the phone was quick,
"Didn't know if you had heard,
Sue's no longer sick!"
I cried out loud and jumped for joy
For I was truly gifted,
First I'd cursed her then repented,
And now the curses's lifted!!
I jumped and danced a lil jig
A smile upon my face,
Until I remembered this was the girl
That took my starter's place!
I'm sure that you can see
The spot that I am in,
It doesn't matter what I do
It seems I just can't win!
Suddenly, it came to me
A rather novel thought,
I think I will just outplay her
And earn my starter's spot.
I can beat her, I know I can
And then I'll watch her holler,
Because she'll know she's been beat
By ME, The Sneaky B-Baller!!!!!